What Did I Just Get Myself Into?

Calling all experienced Girls Camp Leaders. . .

I just volunteered to be a 3rd year leader at the Girls Camp here in the Salem Stake. I'm a little nervous as my experience at camp has only been that of a camper. I'm feeling slightly inadequate and VERY inexperienced. Any advice, tips or tricks you have used in the past, please feel free to share. I need help people. Lots of it! I am super excited and even more nervous.

What did I just get myself into?!

Rockin' and a Rollin', Movin' and a Shakin'

I think I have been feeling the baby move! I've never had this happen before, so I am just assuming what I am feeling is movement. And I am loving it! And today, I have either been having a couple of Braxton Hicks contractions or the baby is pushing up against the front of my lower stomach area. Either way, it's been so cool to experience all these new things. (By the way, Braxton Hicks contractions are so much better than the real things. When I had my miscarriage. . . whew, let's just say after that I KNEW I wanted an epidural once I had a baby.)

I can't wait for my next appointment. I'll be 20 weeks and 3 days at that time and I'll be getting an ultrasound. We still aren't finding out, so sorry to disappoint. But I am still super excited to see this little babe again! And I can't wait for more movement. Yay for active babies! :)

Can I Have It?? Please?!

The title of this post makes me sound like I am a 4 year old begging my mom for that amazing candy bar staring me in the face as we load our groceries onto the check out lane. And really, for all intents and purposes, I AM like a kid in a candy store right now. I just stumbled on this AMAZING blog where she made an old mens polo shirt into a dress that I would pay good money to have. I want that skill. I want that talent. I WANT THAT DRESS!

17 1/2

I am 17 1/2 weeks now. Yippee! Some of you have asked for prego belly pictures, so, I had some fun and did a little photo shoot. Here I am, in all my glory, at 17 1/2 weeks.




Our mirror in our bathroom is really silly, so I had to stand up on the toilet to get these shots. Sorry. :)


I just had to add this one in 'cause I thought I looked like I was trying to be a sass. And it made me laugh. :)

I Dreamed A Dream. . .

Seriously, there are some crazy goings on in the head of Ashley Calaway in the night time. Chalk it up to pregnancy or something, but I just keep having weird dreams! And they're slightly realistic to boot. Anyhow. A few nights ago, I had a dream that I had a baby girl. And she was precious. And the dream was just bizarre. You know how you'll have a dream where you know you are in a certain place but it's just a little bit different than what it looks like in real life? Yup, that was basically the dream. Picture me with my newborn daughter prepared to walk from the Wendy's/Taco Bell area of Court St in Pasco to my parents house on Rd. 100 via I-182. Yup. Weird.

Then last night. . . oh last night. If I could just go back to last night and relive the entire dream, I would. Once again, I dreamed I had a baby girl. (That would make boy dreams at 1 and girl dreams at 2. Girls are winnin this race so far) And in this dream, I had just delivered my baby girl. She was beautiful. She had a full head of dark hair and the most precious face you have ever seen on a baby. Then, we named her Emma. Yes, Emma. Problem: There's already an Emma in my family and an Emiline. Adding yet another one would pose a serious problem. Which I realized by the end of the dream and was trying to figure out a way to tell the Hospital that we had actually changed our minds and we didn't want to name her Emma, but we just weren't sure what we DID want to name her. But I want to go back and hold that baby. When I woke up this morning, I thought, "I'm only 17 weeks along. I'm not even half way. Curse you beautiful baby dream! I just wanna hold a newborn!" D'ya think they'd let me go into the Labor and Delivery section of the hospital and hold random baby's? No? They'd turn me away and tell me to head to the 5th floor? What's on the 5th floor? The Psych ward?!?

Anyway, now I am thoroughly confused. I figured once I had had the dream about having a boy that I would just assume we were having a boy. But now that I have had TWO dreams about little girls and ONE dream about a little boy. . . sheesh. Maybe I will just find out. . . :)

Hey Pretty Baby With The High Heels On!

Last night, Dallin, Marcus, Ashley and I all went to the Portland temple and did an endowment session. It was wonderful. That Temple is SPECTACULAR. Oh my goodness. If you need a weekend away, come down to Portland, go to the temple, hit up Ikea, HomeGoods, and any other wonderful shops you may enjoy (and don't pay sales tax, woot woot!). It would be the ideal weekend.

Oh, and then, when you're done, go to the OMSI museum and see the Michael Jackson themed laser light show. It. Is. AWESOME. We went after our temple session and LOVED it. Well, Dallin actually got a headache from the music being so loud, and it's kinda trippy. As Marcus put it, "these kind of shows must give you a glimpse of what it's like to be high." :) But it was sweet. Thriller was the bomb, because they had these lasers that formed skeletons on the ceiling doing the Thriller dance. It was hilarious. Honestly? Highly entertaining.

I love discovering new things in the places I live. It's so much fun. A few weeks ago, we went to a place called Silver Falls. (I haven't posted about it til now because I TOTALLY look preggers in all the pics of me and Dallin.) It is an amazing place. It's a state park and there are 10 HUGE waterfalls throughout. There is a main path that leads to all 10 waterfalls and, if you do the whole thing, is an impressive 8 mile loop. We decided not to do the entire loop and just did 5 miles instead. Trust me, 5 miles was plenty. By the end, I was worn out. (I know, it's so sad. In normal conditions, as in, not being pregnant, I could have done the whole 8 miles, no sweat. But now, I just get uncomfortable. And I was only 15 weeks at the time, dang it!) We took lots of pictures and loved the scenery. Probably one of the most beautiful days we have enjoyed in this area so far. And there was no rain! Which is kind of a miracle, considering the downpours we have had yesterday and today. Anyhow, here are some of the pictures I have edited so far from Silver Falls.


In front of Angel Falls


...Like I said, totally looking pregnant in these pictures...


Totally sad this one turned out so dark. But it's really good of everyone! :)


Aaaannnddd, I don't remember the name of this particular falls. We saw a lot that day, ok?? Sheesh. :)


Don't mind me, I'm just getting the prego belly. And looking mighty attractive while I'm at it! :)


I believe this one was actually Silver Falls.


This was on our drive to the park.


This is a friend of Marcus and Ashleys (and now a friend of ours :)) Shawna and her little girl Julianne. Shawna's husband, Doug, is in law school with Marcus at Willamette. Is Julianne not one of the CUTEST little girls ever??

Wait, You're Saying I Don't Know Everything??

The most common question I get asked these days is, "what's going on in your life? what are your plans?" To which I gulp and then try to provide an adequate answer. I mean, for heaven's sake, I am about to have a baby! I should have life figured out by now, right? Ha! Unfortunately, I do not. To prove this point, continue reading.

At the beginning of this year, we were in limbo (much like we are now) and I was sick of it. I wanted to KNOW. I NEEDED to know. Where were we going to be a month from then? What was Dallin going to do concerning school? Where was he going to go to school? Were we going to be in Pasco for the summer? Or Oregon? Or somewhere else in the continental US? What was the plan?! I couldn't stand this, "fly by the seat of your pants" thing I was doing. It's the planner in me. I just needed something solid. But, I wasn't getting it. So then, I started getting grumpy. And then, I just got miserable. Why was my life so confusing? I thought once I got married, most of my questions would be answered. No more guessing, right? I found my knight in shining armor, so why the heck didn't I have the castle?! Ok, I didn't need the castle just yet, but I wanted something definite. I was sick of wondering and then trying to answer the question that kept popping up in conversation, "what are your plans?" Then, one day, I woke up and I realized, "I'm not happy." Now, for those of you that know me and have known me for a long time, you know I am a happy person! I always have been! So when I made this realization, I thought, "I want to be happy. I don't like being sad." So, what was I going to do to change it? How was I going to be happy again? I then had a sudden realization. I was just going to be happy. That's all. I was going to make the CHOICE to be happy. I didn't need someone to sit there and give me all the answers. I, personally, just needed to make the choice to be happy. And so I did. And then, NEWS FLASH, I realized I didn't know everything. And I didn't NEED to know everything. But I was happy. Cause I said I was gonna be. I figured out I just needed to remember that I had a loving Heavenly Father who knows me and knows my circumstance. He's not going to lead me in the wrong direction. He's going to make sure that if I am doing what I need to be doing, He'll do what He's promised me He'll do.

A couple months later, I happened upon a scripture that I had forgotten about, though it is one of my absolute favorites. It is in 1 Nephi 11:17, "And I said unto him: I know that he (God) loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things." After reading that, I realized, it's ok not to know everything. Nephi, who obviously knew a whole heckuva lot more than I do, still didn't know everything! But that was ok for him, because he knew that his Heavenly Father loved him! I just need to be more like Nephi, dang it! I am so grateful for those who have gone before me and are so much more wise than I who have taught me some of the greatest lessons to be learned.