Thoughts on Motherhood

Yesterday was a whirlwind kind of a day. Up at 7:00, church at 9:00, Marcus' graduation at 11:30, lunch following, and mingling with family until everyone went their separate ways. By 5:00 I was wondering if I could just go to bed. Instead, I lounged on the couch, played with my baby girl (who was equally, if not more tired than mom and dad) and held off bed time {for her} until 7:45 and {for us} 9:30. I didn't really have a chance to reflect much on being a mom yesterday or reflect on the mothers in my life. But today has been {slightly} less hectic and so I feel like maybe I can organize my thoughts a little.

{February 2012}

I have always wanted to be a mother. Granted, when I was younger, I had various occupations in mind when people asked {paleontologist, nurse, lawyer, professional singer, to name a few} but I knew in my heart that being a mother was always the end goal. As I grew older, I discovered that I couldn't find a major to settle on, as I always thought, "I'm gonna be a mom, what's the point?" Nothing interested me more than the thoughts of one day having my own little brood, teaching them, loving them, nurturing them. I realize the value of education, don't get me wrong, but thoughts of Motherhood seemed to fill my mind, pushing other thoughts like career and education out the window.

{October 2010}

 Now, as I am in the 2nd year of being a mom, I am starting to see me in a whole new way. I've realized my strengths and weaknesses, I've figured out how Claire ticks, only for her to start ticking a whole new way the next day. I've learned that relying on the Lord to help me through my difficult moments is the only way I can make it through and that even in those hard places, I am still completely, 100% in love with being mom. The slobbery kisses, the messy faces, the scraped knees, the cuddles and loves, the whining and complaining, I really do love it all. And at the end of the day, when that sweet little 19 month old is in bed, I look at the toys on the floor, the cheerios crunched into the carpet, the snot on my shoulder, and I know that I was made to be a mother. No other occupation or career could compare to this life I have chosen. No amount of money or benefit plan could possibly be as wonderful as the reward of my little girls face lighting up when she understands something new. So even when the days are long, I'm tired and grumpy, when I don't want to make dinner or clean up yet another mess, I wouldn't trade my station in life for anything else.

{October 2011}

Now, as for the mothers in my own life- To my Mother-in-law, thank you for devoting your life to raising your children, for being so selfless in your service and for loving me right alongside your own children.

To my Mother- Thank you for being the wonderful example of faithful service, loving children, and constant faith in all things. You have been and continue to be the light I look to when things get foggy.

And to all other women who have helped raise me- Sisters, sisters-in-law, grandmas, aunts, cousins, Young Women leaders, Sunday School teachers, Visiting teachers, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for caring about me. You have been mothers to me in so many different ways, all of which I am profoundly grateful for. So, to all the mothers out there, Happy Mothers Day.

Easter 2012

Easter 2012, you say? Yes, I'm just a hair behind. For some reason, I couldn't work up the motivation to edit pictures (lame) and then when I finally wanted to, my computer wasn't working (lame x 2) but I finally figured out how to fix it (not lame) and so all is right in the world!

Easter Sunday was Claire's first Sunday in Nursery at church. Apparently Dallin dropped her off at the classroom, she spotted toys and didn't give him a second glance. It's been that way ever since. Not to brag or anything, but we've got a golden child, people. Don't worry, I am sure the next one will be a hellion, and we'll pay our parenting "dues".

Anyhow, Claire was exhausted from all her hard playing in Nursery so I never got a picture of her in her Easter dress (once again, lame). But, we got some pretty cute pictures of her finding her Easter Basket. Being the true girl that she is, the thing that won her over was the new pair of Sunday shoes that we got her. Never mind the Rainbow Dash My Little Pony that was staring her in the face, oh no, she wanted those shoes. Unfortunately, as soon as we put them on her, she started rolling her ankle with every step she took, so they were returned (yep, you guessed it, LAME). They were so cute, too. Ahh, well.

Now, on to the pictures!

 {This is the John Deere basket I made for Claire last year, but never took a picture of. I am still in love with it!}

 {Rainbow Dash!}

 {Walking in her pretty shoes}

Easter was a wonderful day filled with thoughts of our Savior, His Atonement and the beautiful gift that it is in our lives. We are forever grateful for His ultimate sacrifice.

18 Months

Can you believe it? My baby is going to be 18 months on Monday. Where, I ask you, did the time go?? She goes to nursery this Sunday. It's a happy day in the Calaway household. I remember when she turned a year old, I kept thinking about how nursery was only 6 months away and I just couldn't fathom putting her in there. It was like I was going to be abandoning my baby! Well, after 6 months of wrestling her through sacrament meeting and Dallin wrestling with her through Sunday School and Priesthood, we are so ready to put her in. I just hope she doesn't beat up the other kids in the class. She gets kind of possessive with the toys she's playing with... It could be that she doesn't have anyone else to share her toys with. I'm sure you're all thinking, "well, she could have someone to share her toys with if you guys had another kid sometime soon", to which I would reply, "yes, someday there will be another one, but not yet. Give it time, Kevin." (Dominoes commercial reference).

Back to the topic. Claire isn't so keen on sharing, even with her stuffed animals. Dallin just delights in teasing our poor daughter (as well as me) and puts her shoes on her stuffed animals feet. Apparently that doesn't fly in Claire's book, so she immediately rips them off the unsuspecting feet of the poor Tigger, Polar Bear or Cabbage Patch Monkey. I'm trying to teach her to share, but Dallin seems to be thwarting my efforts by teasing relentlessly. Oh well, teasing makes her stronger, right? That or I am going to have to find a shrink in a few years to discuss her unstable mental health due to excessive teasing by her father. (Kidding. He's not THAT bad.)

Claire has recently taken a liking to My Little Pony, which just makes my heart happy. I was a My Little Pony girl growing up and though the newer version of the show is a little more Anime than I remember, it's still annoyingly cute. (Dallin thinks it's annoying, I think it's cute.) The other day, as we were watching, Claire yelled out, "APPLEJACK!" and I about fainted. It was clear as day. I think I might be getting her an Applejack pony for Easter...

Other words that have entered Claire's ever expanding vocabulary are, "go", "don't", "no", "mom", "dad", "hi dad", "what", "all done", "wow", "oh", and she sings all day. I've already contacted various recording studios telling them we have a budding star in our home. Strangely, we keep getting hung up on. (Kidding. Again. About the recording studio, I mean.)

Claire has recently gone from walking to running. Nothing can ever be done at a walking pace now. It's just running. And she's a pretty fast little lady too. I wish I could say my running to keep up with her has resulted in weight loss for me, but alas, my waistline remains unchanged. Ah well, that's the price of motherhood, I guess. Or the Daynight Donuts we got on Monday night for FHE...

All in all, the last 18 months of our lives have been just amazing. Full of ups and downs, love and laughter, tears and frustration and all other wonderful things. We love our baby girl (who looks more toddler now than baby) and love where we are.

And now, the moment you have all been waiting for... Or the place you have all just scrolled down to, in order to skip my weird antics above. The pictures! These are just a mish mash of pictures over the last month. Enjoy them all!