August 8, 2010

Day 12: Gray

Do you ever feel you have some gray areas in the gospel? Things that aren't clearly defined? Something that could potentially be good or bad, you're just not sure which? Am I making ANY sense?! I have a little gray area in my life right now that I am just not sure about. Granted, this isn't a big issue and I don't think it will exclude me from eternal life, but for me, right now, it's kind of a big deal.

Leggings. Leggings with short dresses. Leggings with tunics. Is it bad? Or is it ok? I am totally eating my words right now, because when the legging trend started, I remember thinking, "that is the DUMBEST thing I have ever seen. I will NEVER be caught dead in leggings." Never say never in the fashion world, Ash. I remember I also said never to skinny jeans. Guess who owns a pair? But I digress.

BYU-Idaho won't let you wear leggings with a short skirt or dress (not sure what their policy is on tunics) on campus so I kind of took that as a shove in the direction of what I should make my policy. But I have seen tons of women (young and old) who are totally strong in the gospel, no problems with their testimonies, wearing leggings. So it can't be bad right?!

I talked to Dallin about it last night. When I first told him how I have been really wanting to try out the legging look, his eyes lit up and he nodded very quickly saying, "yes, yes, you really should try it." I think he's a fan, huh? Then I told him of my little moral dilemma.

"But is it considered immodest? Will people look down on me because I am wearing that?"

He said he couldn't answer that question. Instead, he posed a thought provoking question to me. "Where will it lead?"

"Where will what lead?" I asked.

"Where will you wearing leggings lead? Will it lead you in a positive direction? Or will it cause you to second guess modesty? Will it cause others to look at you inappropriately? And then where could that lead?" He replied.

I love that my husband asks those hard, thought provoking questions. I just sat and thought about it. I didn't give an answer, because I am still feeling like I am in the gray.

Disclaimer: If you wear leggings, do not for one second think that I will ever, ever judge you based on that. I will be the last person to ever judge because of something as silly as that. Like I said, I think it's such a cute style. I am just personally trying to figure out where I stand on the matter. So please, feel free to wear whatever you want to around me and know that I will never pass a judgment. (I just might covet your style, however.)

So I am opening this one up to you, readers. Tell me what you think. Have the Brethren come out with anything about leggings? Has the General Young Womens Presidency come out with anything? Do you have an opinion? Am I just a silly girl that is really over thinking this current "issue" in my life? Wait, I'll answer that. YES. But really, I want to know thoughts and opinions about this, so spill all, my dear readers. I would ask that you please be courteous and kind in your remarks and in response to others remarks. We're all friends here. :)

I just want you all to know, I value modesty. I always have. It's been ingrained in me ever since I was a little girl. I have a testimony of the power of modesty too. It gets hard in this day and age to find things that are modest and appropriate, but we are so blessed when we do dress modestly. So help a girl out. Help her figure out this gray area of her life so she can move on to more important things. :)

10 comments:

Jennilyn Kent said...

I have no clue, but when they first came out a friend of mine and I were talking and she said if you shirt/dress was long enough to cover your garments then she thought that was okay. I don't like the garment lines you get with leggings and most the shirts are shorter than your garments, so i have just stayed away from the for the most part. But I do have to say that I am loving the new jeggings. Jean leggings. I bought a couple pairs that are not the legging type, but a typical pair of jeans with a maternity demi waist band that you could wear pregnant or not. I think they are going to be great with boots (no bulkiness at the knees) and long sweaters or tunics. I bought mine at BP, but Gap has great new line of them too. I love wearing boots in the winter but dont like the bagginess of jeans at the knee, I think jeggings are a great option. Now some jeggings I think are just like leggings, but the ones I bought are more of a jean. I know this is just a bunch of mumbo jumbo, but maybe jeggings would help you out. The one pair I bought were black too. The same look you get with black leggings.

Lfoxy said...

i think they are really cute. definitely a go. but not in church. for some reason i think it looks weird and inappropriate. that's my opinion. and you are totally right--a person can be totally strong in the gospel and wear leggings. i am going to have to check out those aforementioned 'jeggings'. they sound rad.

tharker said...

I just bought my first pair (since 6th grade, anyway ;) a couple of weeks ago.

For me, I don't wear them unless the dress I'm wearing is long enough to be worn without them. I think they look cute with the dress, but I also make sure that the dress could be modest on it's own.

Here's an interesting thought. I remember having a conversation with Sam and Meredith several years ago, about Shade shirts/Downeast...undershirts basically. Sam's question was now that we have an undershirt, is it still okay to wear the immodest shirt over it, when clearly we could never wear it on it's own? Is it still an immodest shirt? I wear a Shade shirt every day underneath shirts that I could never get away with otherwise. It's interesting to me that I seem to have made a double standard for myself with the shirts vs. leggings...

You're right, this is totally gray ;)

Ashley Calaway said...

Jennilyn, you totally made sense, don't worry. :)

Lauren, the jeggings they are coming out with are super cute, totally check em out.

And Tiff, great! Now I am gonna wonder if I am being immodest with my shade shirts?! ;-) It is such a gray area. I guess my thoughts are, if you are dressing with the standards in mind and you aren't trying to make excuses to dress immodestly, then you're heading in the right direction. It's still totally gray though. :)

tharker said...

I agree. I think your intentions have everything to do with. The Lord judges us not only on our actions, but even more so on our hearts.

Lindsey said...

I am so glad you asked this question. I have been wondering about this too. I actually have a couple pairs of leggings, but I have only been able to bring myself to wear them a few times because I just can't decide if I think they are modest for me or not.

I probably got way too into this, but I ended up calling my mom to see what she thought. As we talked we decided it is definitely not the end of the world to wear leggings, but it just might be the safe bet to hold ourselves to a little higher standard. My mom referred me to the August Ensign to an article called "Finding Ourselves in Lehi's Dream." It is a must read.

He talks about his friend who gradually let his standards slip until he fell away from the church. He says, "Sometimes it is so simple a thing as how you groom yourself or what you wear..." And later he says, "You will be safe if you look like and groom like and act like an ordinary Latter-day Saint..."

Sorry I really went off on a tangent, but these quotes helped me and I thought they might help you too.

I promise I don't think less of anyone who wears leggings. I agree it is totally cute and I really think it's cute on pregnant ladies. I love reading everyone's insights on this subject. Good luck figuring this one out!

Ashley Calaway said...

Lindsey, thank you! I appreciate everyone's feedback, and that quote from the Ensign is just what I needed to hear.

Megan said...

I don't own any leggings at the moment but do think they look super cute. I'm with your friend that thinks they look weird at church - maybe too casual or something and that they probably shouldn't be used so that you can wear something super short. Although the shade things has me wondering too. It is all so gray. I think I'd go for it. It's basically like a shade shirt for your legs right. I hate when I bend down in a long enough skirt and church or wherever and realize my g's are showing. . .

Jenna said...

I've been thinking about this same thing lately! My problem with leggings and short dresses/shirts is this... Leggings are so tight, they might as well be nylons. The are just as form fitting as nylons. So for that reason, I would feel uncomfortable wearing them with a short dress. Especially to church, which I've seen too often. I agree with the above comment that they are too casual.

As far as the shade shirt discussion goes, I think there is a difference. When you wear short dresses with leggings, it still completely shows your thighs, which is what I think would be considered immodest. Shade shirts are just a regular shirt, and you can wear another shirt over them. They provide the same coverage that a normal shirt would. I don't know if that makes sense to you but it does in my head.

I guess my main issue with leggings is how tight they are. I sure wish the Presidency would say something about them so we know what's right!

Tara Cobia said...

Ash, so I agree with Jenna about the shade shirts, and definitely that leggings to church is too casual. I agree that if you're going to wear them, it's fine if the dress could be worn by itself, on its own without the leggings. Prego women I think look especially cute in them :) I haven't gotten into them myself, but I have seen many a cute female in them.