I was going to try and get two posts in yesterday, but, as we all know, Saturday is a special day, it's the day we get ready for Sunday. And amidst all the laundry and cleaning and unpacking from living in Pasco for a month and half, the second post just didn't make it on here. So, I'll be a day behind.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I listened to general conference on my way home from Pasco on Friday. As I listened, another hymn was sung that I absolutely love, but had forgotten about in recent months; Let Zion in Her Beauty Rise. The last two lines of the song are my favorite lyrics. "A thousand years, oh, Glorious Day! Dear Lord, prepare my heart to stand with Thee on Zion's mount and never more to part."
I have been thinking about that line a lot in the past few days and have wondered, "am I letting the Lord into my life to prepare my heart to meet Him?" I'm still undecided on my answer. You see, I'm a very independent person. In my life, whenever a problem has come my way, I have chosen to work it out on my own, reasoning that I can do it by myself. If ever a confrontation would arise or someone would give me offense, most of the time, that person would never know I was angry with them, because I would work everything out in my head and move on, never discussing the problem. I've got enough of a "control freak nature" to just want to do things on my own, because I know I can do them the way I want them done. But, that's not how the Lord works. He wants to help me when a problem arises in my life. My issue is, sometimes, I won't let Him. I have this silly complex that makes me not ask for help. As I have gotten older, I have recognized it and have worked to let go and have faith, but it's been a shaky work in progress. When I heard that line, however, I was reminded that I have to let go and put my life in the Lord's hands and know that He knows better than I. Faith is a funny thing. It seems so easy to say you have it, but it's quite a different matter to really live by it. But I am attempting to let go of my life and place it in the Lord's hands, so that He can prepare my heart to meet Him on that Glorious Day.
Sunset in Pasco, WA July 2010